Samuel Shiro

News in Briefs 01/07/12

There’s a thief in our midst! Ok, that’s not really a shock as it seems like there’s always a thief around these days. But things just seem to get worse. Just when you think that the worst of something has passed it just comes back and slaps you back in the face again. Anyway, I think you might be able to predict some of what comes up this week.

Political Oops of the Week

So Chancellor Angela Merkel decided to give in and now the German taxpayer will be actively funding the broken banks of Europe. I can’t help but think that this will be the decision that everybody regrets in the next five years. Let’s look at it like this. Germany has essentially said that we will save Europe with everything we have. Now, the only way they can do this is by plugging more and more money into it.

It’s nothing but a delusion. What Chancellor Angela Merkel doesn’t realise is that it’s just deluding the markets because every time German money is plugged into the hole the markets will go up, but the currency is fundamentally flawed. It’s broken and it just eats money and swallows it up. Unlike other currencies that occasionally get hungry, the Euro suffers from perpetual hunger. After what it’s been through no investor will trust it again. It will collapse, and now that Germany has committed herself she will go down with the Euro sooner or later.

Let’s look at the overall logic of the affair. Closer integration and spending got us into this mess in the first place. So what’s the logic to solve the problem? Oh that’s right, more integration and more spending. Yeah, that’ll work.

Homeless — Oh look it's a vision of Germany in the future.

The Painful…

Lord Wei, the guy who was the guru of David Cameron’s Big Society plan, has marked his return to public life as he just revealed that he wants to encourage new retirees to volunteer and give something back to the community. Ok, he hasn’t said that it’s compulsory or anything like that, it’s not like national service. Now, I can understand that it would be a nice thing to have as some pensioners probably would like to volunteer and do something with their time. But what gets me is that he’s having the audacity to say that pensioners should be giving something back to society.

The contradiction in what Lord Wei is saying is shocking. As part of this Big Society initiative he’s saying that since pensioners have worked for the community all their lives they should now be giving back to the community. How is working your entire life not giving something to society? If anything they should be encouraged to go away and do what they like because they’ve dedicated their lives to society. It just seems so ungrateful and just blatantly wrong.

I don’t have a problem with the fact that he wants to make a service like this available, but what I do have a problem with is the way he’s presenting it. He’s making it sound as if new retirees haven’t given enough and should be made to do more. In other words, he’s basically going for the guilt-trip factor.

…And the Pointless

The pointless, wow, we have something quite weird this week. This week it was aged 46 Nicolas Saunders who was caught by his ex-wife in her bed with her bull mastiff. If you don’t know what a bull mastiff is then we’ve provided you with a picture of one here. And, yes, the father-of-three was naked. He actively called the dog to his room and his wife found him attempting to stick his lightning rod into Sasha’s weather balloon; Sasha is the dog.

He was then arrested and was forced to provide a sperm sample, which, of course, came back as a 100% match to the substance found on Sasha. But Mr. Nicolas Saunders isn’t finished yet. Even despite his humiliation he now has to go back to court for pre-sentencing. I’m curious to know how many years you can possibly get for having sex with your ex-wife’s dog, maybe he can tell us all about it soon?

The So Outrageous that it’s Borderline Hilarious

This is the part that’s incredibly predictable. I’ll just give you one entity to attune you to the subject matter that I’m going to be discussing next. Ready, ok let me just stretch it out, it’s the banks. Yes, the banks are at it again. Corruption, cheating, thieving, and doing it doggy style with the public’s money once again.

Firstly, the banks started by being caught for manipulating interest rates. Although as of this writing it’s only been Barclays that were fined the £290 million the other banks are also under investigation, and the case is expected to cast its net over a number of American banks as well. So expect more fines and more naming and shaming to come after this case.

But it wasn’t over, oh no. Less than 48 hours later they were back in the news because they’ve been caught mis-selling insurance plans to small businesses. Supposedly, these expensive packages were designed to protect small businesses against the impact of changing interest rates. Whilst the packages were perfectly applicable to some businesses, the banks were selling them to companies that didn’t even need them. And they were too complicated to understand so they made sure that nobody would ever know that they were pointless.

And before this we had the Payment Protection Insurance (PPI) scandal, which was just blatant exploitation. Oh and nobody can forget all the stuff that we had to deal with in 2008 when they almost committed suicide.

What can we do about it though?

The answer is probably nothing as they have a complete and total hold over us. If we upset them then they just move somewhere else. And if that happens then London will turn into a slum.

Anyway, maybe next week won’t be so bleak and irritating after all…

Can Doctors do a Damn Thing?

I may as well get it out there and just say no. Doctors are backing future industrial action and are refusing to accept the new changes to their professions without a fight. Of course, it’s all about pensions where they will have to put in more to get less out. In theory, it’s upsetting as they had a deal, but in reality they are still getting almost £50,000 a year as part of their pension plans. However, with the British Medical Association now calling for the health secretary Andrew Lansley to resign, things only look like they are going to get worse.

kidding

Let’s look at the way doctors take industrial action. They take industrial action by refusing to carry out non-emergency care. So they still go into work, but instead of doing most of their work they just sit around and do nothing. It’s almost like a passive form of resistance or a slow-down, as some call it. Does it put the public in danger? No. Does it irritate the hell out of people who might have had their operations delayed for months because of it? Yes.

So can doctors do anything?

Any successful strike either has to have popular support or power. Doctors have the power as they can simply refuse to care for people any longer, which would have massive consequences. However, we all know, and health secretary Andrew Lansley also knows, that they won’t do this. Even with the recent industrial action not all doctors supported it as they believed that the general public shouldn’t suffer because of any dispute they had. Ok, so the doctors have power that they can’t use. That’s that out of the way.

Do they have popular support?

It really depends on who you ask about popular support as there will be differing opinions. You ask the government and they will say no, which they’ve actually said on live TV as part of BBC News. If you ask a doctor who wants to go on strike then the doctor will not really answer the question. Instead they’ll just talk about fairness for the next five minutes. So, no, they don’t have popular support. What they don’t realise is that people don’t care about your £50,000-a-year pension. To most people, this is an absolutely fantastic pension, regardless of what happened to change. And people won’t have their healthcare disrupted over a dispute like this. Fairness, in the eyes of doctors, has to come through mass disruption. And people are simply not interested in that.

So doctors can’t really do anything at all as they don’t have either of the key things they need to produce a successful strike. As for whether they are correct, well that’s up to you to decide. In my opinion, they are only correct because they already signed a deal. Doctors who were already in the profession when that original deal was signed, I believe, should be kept under that deal. The new changes from health secretary Andrew Lansley should only apply to new doctors who will be entering the profession. Yes, doctors will argue that they deserve those massive pensions, but a few more years training than everybody else shouldn’t entitle you to that much when everybody else has to suffer.

Why should you be an exception?

Rookie Photographers are Killing the Industry

That’s something that’s commonly said by professional photographers these days. As soon as they lose a client to a rookie they automatically turn on them and then they fly into a rage that lasts for the rest of the day. However, are these rookies really killing the industry of professional photography? Do professionals have a right to be upset?

To answer the latter question, professionals do have a right to be upset. But it’s not for the reason you are thinking of. The only reason they have a right to be upset is because they are losing business. Although, it has to be mentioned that this is just the nature of the industry. These days it’s simple to pick up a good camera. The days of the photographer in a darkroom are gone. Today all you have to do is upload your pictures to Facebook and you already have professional-looking photographs. Add on the fact that Photoshop and other image editing programs are available and what exactly does the professional provide?

At this point the only thing a professional provides is experience, but experience is not something that’s a defining factor these days. If you can shoot professional photographs and present them in an attractive manner then you can do the same job that these professionals can. In essence, it’s a case of sour grapes.

In the past, the photographers were on a plane of their own. If you took a photograph from one of these cameras then people knew you were serious. If you took one from a poor quality camera then they knew you were just an amateur. Technology has advanced by so much that this isn’t the case anymore. This means it can be harder to differentiate between the hobbyist and the one who does it for a living. Many of them don’t like this. In fact, they absolutely hate it as it doesn’t have the status it once did. Ok, I would be upset too if I was in this position, but if a professional is losing lots of their business then it’s their fault in part.

Why do I say that?

Simple, professional photographers have often been in the game for so long that they are unwilling to change. Previously they could just sit on their arses and wait for clients to come to them. So they didn’t have to do that much marketing as they had the equipment, the experience, and the work to put them well above everybody else. Now that everybody has that stuff they are forced to start marketing. Many of them can’t or won’t do this, though. So instead of adapting to a changing industry they have to whine, they have to moan, and they have to bitch about all the rookies entering the industry.

“What about those evil low prices?” I hear a master whine.

Well those evil low prices are a problem, it’s true. That means it’s natural that trade will decline a little bit. However, those who are looking for quality will pay a higher price. If they want a $100 photo then they can have a $100 photo, but they could have a $200 photo instead. So really it’s a case of educating one’s customer base. How can this be done? Well that can be done through marketing. You educate your customers and you will get the people to pay that little bit extra for quality.

Those who decide to sit around and cry about it will only falter as the amateurs and hobbyists continue to take great photos and make lots of money out of them. Don’t want to adapt? Then too bad, I’ll see you when I walk past the local job centre.

News in Briefs 24/06/12

Greek elections bringing about pretty much the same stuff as before, education changes, coalition splits, more chuntering from Ed Miliband, and a Syrian Civil War that people have stopped caring about. It’s been a busy week so it’s time to get started. Although I hope this column won’t include most of that stuff, if I’m lucky!

Political Oops of the Week

Away from Syria and the same old stuff from the Eurozone, we now move to Egypt once again. It’s been a long time since much of relevance happened in Egypt, but after the military rulers dissolved the entire parliament last weekend things started to move forward again. So this week they then introduced new powers for themselves. To put it simply, they can now control the budget, implement new legislation (as governed by themselves), and the president now doesn’t really exist in any real capacity despite the fact the leader of the Muslim Brotherhood won fair and square.

This pretty much reminds me of how most dictatorships are created. The military tends to always back a dictator and this is how they do it. The only difference is that the military happens to have a ruler from its own brotherhood, as opposed to an outsider leading it.

On the plus side, at least that bed-ridden bastard Mubarak is about to go to the great hospital bed on Satan’s right nipple.

The Painful…

This was quite a recent YouGov poll conducted in the US. It basically said that 63% of all high level Republicans still believe that Iraq had Weapons of Mass Destruction (WMD) when they invaded it in 2003. This was compared to 15% of Democrats. So you’re telling me that the most powerful country in the Western world should be governed by a party like the Republicans who have a majority of people that believe that WMDs existed in Iraq in 2003? And this is despite the fact that solid evidence consisting of first-hand accounts are arguing for the opposite.

I don’t like to believe that all Americans are complete and utter morons, but the politicians certainly are. Not only do they operate a system that favours only the multi-millionaires, due to the lack of any controls on campaign spending, but it’s an example that a lot of rich people really do live sheltered lives. I hope for the sake of the entire Western world that Obama receives a second term in the White House. But the problem is I honestly do think that he will get voted out, and we will all be left regretting that.

…And the Pointless

Zimbabwean MPs have decided to undergo circumcision as part of a campaign to reduce the prevalence of AIDS in the country. In 2009 Unicef reported that around 14% of the adult population had either HIV or full-blown AIDS. I can understand that the National Trust says that you can reduce AIDS by up to 60% by getting circumcised. However, what gets me is how we prevent the same problem in the West. We don’t mutilate our own cocks in order to prevent it. It just seems to be extreme and unnecessary. Surely a better idea to reduce those Unicef statistics would be to just use a little common sense and just stop having so much sex with strangers? Those statistics will go down by themselves if people just use a little responsibility and common sense.

Oh wait, common sense is in short supply these days isn’t it?

The So Outrageous that it’s Borderline Hilarious

Jimmy Carr is the subject of this section this week as his story really is fitting. Let’s look at the facts. Jimmy Carr utilises a legal yet slightly unethical loophole to bring his tax bill down to single figures, when realistically it should be nearer 50%. For those who don’t understand how he did this, I’ll explain the general process. This scheme, which many figures like the members of Take That are using, is all about creating an off-shore company. The way it works is that they send the money to the company and they then have it loaned back to them immediately. When it comes to loans there’s no tax attached to them so he’s essentially getting the same amount of money without paying any tax at all.

So this week he apologised. I watched his shows and he did get heckled quite a bit, but the most surprising thing is that he was actually being cheered for everything despite the fact that what he did was still blatantly wrong. He never had to pay back any of this money and now the matter is supposedly closed.

It really does amaze me how fickle some people are. We’ll complain about bankers and multinational companies doing this sort of thing for hours and hours on end, but when Jimmy Carr does it then all it takes is a crap apology and that’s the end of the matter. Come on!

Anyway, maybe next week won’t be as bleak and irritating after all…

Locked-In, In More Ways Than One

The chances are that you’ve already heard of the case being put forward by the family of 58-year-old Tony Nicklinson. Tony suffers from a syndrome known as locked-in syndrome. This syndrome arose due to the fact that he had a stroke that left him paralysed everywhere, but his mind still functions perfectly.

As a result of his injuries, he can now only communicate through a special computer. This computer monitors his eye movements and allows him to speak. The case being put forward is that he wants it to be made legal for a doctor to allow him to die, but the government has said that this will authorise murder.

On one hand, the government is right. Such a system would be open to corruption from dodgy doctors and those who would happily kill off ailing relatives in an attempt to claim what they have without waiting. Yes, this corruption would be there, but it’s also something that has to be worked around. You can’t just accept that nothing can be done about corruption. You can’t just accept this and refuse to implement a better system because of it.

What the government is essentially doing is condemning Mr. Nicklinson to years and years of misery at the hands of locked-in syndrome. And make no mistake, he’s not ill. What irritates him is the fact that he’s still perfectly healthy and he will live for years and years to come. And he will have to live like that for the rest of his life. That’s why he wants to die, but why shouldn’t he be allowed to die? Switzerland has a system where people can get doctors to kill them, a process known as euthanasia.

We have the basic human right that we have a right to life, so surely we also have the right to die? I’m quite frankly sick of the rubbish from the past that says that every life is sacred. No, it’s not. Life is not sacred. It’s just a life like every other animal on the planet. They are our lives. And our lives are something that we should be able to end if we feel like it. Suicide is now legal under the Suicide Act of 1961, and with the excellent safeguards against malpractice in euthanasia other countries have in place, it is an antiquated idea that it should be illegal. It’s unfair and it’s just plain wrong. It’s almost as if it’s admitting that the government has control over our lives.

This case of locked-in syndrome comes just after another case where an anorexic woman from Wales, who wanted to die, ended up in court. The terrifying thing is that even though the woman wished to die, the judge ruled against her and declared that she must be force-fed to prevent her death.

Now we are not only avoiding the issue, we are actively working against it.

Justice

Is the Internet for Them or for Us?

Recent internet governance is ambiguous at best as it’s no longer just the domain of that strange guy you see on the bus. It’s the domain of anyone who wants to try and take control of it. Conspiracy theorists have tried to yell and scream over the years that the governments of the world are attempting to use their tentacles to ensnare the internet and take it over like some strange Japanese porn flick, and it turns out they were right.

Internet ball — I wonder what's in the centre? I hope it's chocolate.

As we can see from recent legislation in the UK, the government is attempting to force internet providers to make all information about email messages and web history available to police for approximately one year. And we all know about internet restrictions in China and Iran. In fact, even little Ethiopia is getting in on the act as they attempt to bring in more restrictions to bring the internet under the control of the state.

What’s clear is this: internet governance is now a very real possibility.

Is there anything we can do about it though? The answer is absolutely. We can take on the governments of the world because we know that they are slow and clunky. If one of their security fields can be bypassed then it will take them months, and sometimes years, to sort out the problems again. I’m not worried for the conspiracy theorists or the computer geeks out there because people like us laugh in the face of the state’s attempts at restricting access to certain areas. Just look at the recent Pirate Bay ban. One proxy later and I’m back in my lovely bay of brothels, seadogs, rum, and questionable downloads.

Can the government take the whole thing over?

My answer is absolutely not. The only way that they could do this is if they turned into a dictatorial state where they directly admitted that they were controlling the internet. At the moment we are still playing a guerrilla game as they still pretend that they are doing this in the interest of justice and law. And as any good computer user knows, that couldn’t be more wrong. Those who deal in crime will not be fooled by some minor blocking techniques. All this will catch is the novices and the innocent, so in other words it’s a complete waste of time. And it’s not just a waste of time, it’s a £1.8 billion waste of time from the UK taxpayer.

The Dictator

For now, I can confidently say that the freedom of the internet still lives on and internet governance has not yet come into force in the western world, but I do have my fears. Those computer novices will be suffering already, but those with even the slightest nugget of knowledge will still be safe. I don’t think that there will be any outright control over the internet anytime soon. However, our freedom will be steadily eroded away in the coming years.

Get those tinfoil hats out, conspiracy theorists and normal people alike!